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She would also talk about how she was going to kill herself that day.

She would complain about having no reason to live, and how she would rather be dead. When we moved to Salt Lake City, my mother began to change. I adored my father, Arthur Blackmore, and felt safe when I was in his presence. My childhood memories begin in Salt Lake City, where my parents moved when I was five. I was born in 1968 in Hildale, Utah, a fundamentalist Mormon community known as the FLDS. But the spankings stopped when our father was home, which was a relief. She spent more time in bed, and when my father came home, the house was tense. #4 My mother’s depression worsened as her children grew up. She was raising righteous children, and teaching them obedience was one of her most important responsibilities. #3 I grew up with the understanding that my mother was doing what was considered good discipline by the community. I was terrified about what would happen to us if my mother killed herself.

#2 When we moved to Salt Lake City, my mother began to change.

#1 I was born in 1968 in Hildale, Utah, a fundamentalist Mormon community known as the FLDS. Please note: This is a companion version & not the original book.